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Goal Quit Porn for Four Months

Discussion in 'Fitness' started by HelloFriendo, Feb 12, 2018.

Goal: Quit Porn for Four Months by July 1, 2018 (finished)

100%

Canceled

Member HelloFriendo commits to the following actions to achieve this goal

Will not browse any pornography and will abstain from viewing any kind of sexually enticing material

  1. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83

    Goal Approval

    As title implies, I will abstain from all forms of porn until at least July 1st, 2018. I will allow myself to masturbate at most once a week and sex is still okay, but use of porn is prohibited.
     
  2. James

    James Host

    Ok glad you've set a goal, but firmly declaring intent is not enough by itself to make this goal strong, especially for a bad habit goal, especially at long time frame like 4 months.

    Please lay out the following:
    - What thought/situational process leads up to you doing this
    - How will you head it off / what will you do in place
    - What attempts to weasel out of or excuse yourself from your goal will occur when you have a craving, and how will you avoid or cut those off when they start
    - What tools will you use to help entrench your commitment
     
    HelloFriendo likes this.
  3. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83
    Point taken.

    The main driver for my motivation to quit is that I believe constant use is having a negative impact on my mood, my confidence, and my social anxiety. I have also been a habitual user for the past 15 years or so and would love to know what potential I can unleash by abstaining. I also have come to realize what an absolute time-waster viewing this garbage is.

    Because my typical routine after work/dinner/putting son to bed involves de-stressing alone in my basement, my main focus at first is going to be re-orienting my nightly routine. I am banning myself from being alone in my basement except to do laundry. In lieu of spending this time alone in my basement, I will perform nightly rounds of meditation (at least 10 minutes), stretching/myofascial release, and reading. I am planning on making reading X number of books another separate goal, which will help drive this change in nightly habits.

    I anticipate the biggest risks to relapse will be the mindsets of either "well I've stayed away from the stuff for a week/month/longer, I proved I'm not addicted so why not just take a peek" or "I'm feeling much happier/more confident, why not celebrate and treat myself." In order to prevent these mindsets from causing a relapse, I will keep in mind that I have a group of people holding me accountable to this goal, and succumbing to temptation will not only cause negative effects on myself but will mean failure in the eyes of that group. Another tactic I plan to employ is during my morning cold showers, mentally remind myself why I am doing this and telling myself that I WILL NOT allow temptation to ruin this goal.

    In light of this endeavor, I have deleted my entire stash. This should not really matter in terms of relapse because, like I mentioned, I will not allow myself to use my personal computer during this time. Still, this was an act that solidified in my mind that I am serious about beating this beast.

    Above all else, my plan to beat this is to STAY BUSY. If ever I feel bored, or aimless, I will force myself to do something constructive. There is always cleaning in my house to do and I can always spend time bettering my knowledge of my day-to-day job duties or working on outstanding items.
     
    James likes this.
  4. Tom

    Tom Active Member

    Rating points:
    108
    Action points:
    261
    Result points:
    221
    This is key. Keep busy with useful stuff. Oh wait, you've already called it...:

    You're on the right track man. Lets do this.
     
  5. Gort

    Gort Robot

    Notification: Goal approved!

    The community voted to approve this goal as Doable and SMART.
    Now, do your best to succeed! Your next progress update will come due on Sun, 18 Feb 2018.
     
  6. Gort

    Gort Robot

    Notification: Goal update is due.

    Please submit an update on your goal progress.
     
  7. Gort

    Gort Robot

    Notification: Update not submitted.

    The goal update was not submitted within the time limit.
     
  8. James

    James Host

    I guess OP was too busy jerking off to post his update.
     
    Shaney96 likes this.
  9. Shaney96

    Shaney96 Active Member

    Rating points:
    94
    Action points:
    634
    Result points:
    709
    You savage fuck, probably true tho'.
    Another dropout :/
     
  10. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83
    Nope, I am still here and still abstaining.

    Going strong...temptations got very powerful around day 5 but I was successful at keeping them at bay. Staying out of my basement has been huge help. Didn't go near my computer all weekend and got through a significant portion of "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. I can't remember the last time I went longer than a week so the next few days are going to be very trying, but I'm confident I can do this.
     
  11. Shaney96

    Shaney96 Active Member

    Rating points:
    94
    Action points:
    634
    Result points:
    709
    Good to hear you're still kicking.
    Great book. Go through it slow and really try to process the shit he talks about. He goes off on one when he starts talking about periods, but everything before that is golden.
     
    HelloFriendo likes this.
  12. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83
    Yeah it's one of those books that I expect I will need to read a couple times to fully digest what it's trying to get across. I find it most helpful not to get too caught up in Tolle's use of words like "being," "God," or "pain-body" and focus more on the overarching ideas and practical tips. The two big things that have helped me the most are 1. mentally identifying when I start to ruminate on the past or get anxious about the future and 2. making a regular effort throughout the day to draw my focus inward and be mindful of my body's sensations.
     
  13. Fundinn

    Fundinn Active Member

    Rating points:
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    304
    Having read the book three times, the whole thing about "being", "pain-body" and "God" mostly point to physical and psychological awereness.

    A simple question when your mind goes off on a tangent is : "Where am I and why am I here for?", example answer:

    "I am in the metro, I feel the weight of my body in my feet, the contact of my hand with the metal beam. There are people around me and it is quite humid. I am here as a means to head over to work."

    It's obvious, but were rarely "here" when were in a routine. It's about finding grace and dignity in the smaller, more mundane details of daily life.
     
  14. Gort

    Gort Robot

    Notification: Goal update is due.

    Please submit an update on your goal progress.
     
  15. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83
    Today marks the longest I have gone without the use of porn since I can remember! Overall I’m feeling pretty good...been experiencing some mood swings but focusing on keeping busy has made things a lot easier. I think the greatest part of taking this course of abstinence is that now I have a lot more time to spend on activities that are beneficial to my long term goals, like reading.

    Gotta keep this going!
     
    Shaney96 likes this.
  16. James

    James Host

    Good stuff.

    But you need to use the submit as goal update button to satisfy Gort. You can quote your own post to reuse it.
     
  17. Fundinn

    Fundinn Active Member

    Rating points:
    44
    Action points:
    207
    Result points:
    304
    That's great HF, overtime, you will also notice that there's a sense of ownership when you speak with people about sex. In place of, feeling the impostor syndrome that comes from knowing that you binge-watch porn and can't control an urge to masturbate, but never tell anyone.
     
  18. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83

    Goal Update

     

    Voting on this update has closed.

  19. Tom

    Tom Active Member

    Rating points:
    108
    Action points:
    261
    Result points:
    221
    Holy shit man, insane goal update. Battling the mood swings and being more productive whilst keeping the fake titties away!

    I got mood swings after I took a ~5 day break from video games, was bizarre!
     
  20. Gort

    Gort Robot

    Notification: The previous update has been rated.

    The score was: 5.00.

    Your next progress update will come due on Sun, 04 Mar 2018
     

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