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Brainstorming Quitting Porn

Discussion in 'Fitness' started by HelloFriendo, Jan 24, 2018.

  1. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83
    Alright folks! The time has come. I have spent the better part of my life allowing sources of cheap happiness to be an escape for bettering myself or putting myself in uncomfortable situations. While I am planning on finding more ways to "put myself out there" in the near future, my first step is to re-wire my reward system and get the worst of these vices 100% out of my life: porn.


    Wanted to air out my plan, as well as triggers and replacements for the activities, and see what you all think. Once I get some feedback, will go ahead and set my goal.


    Tentative Goal:

    Abstain from the aforementioned vice 100% for three months. Ideally, this will be permanent, but as I have been habitual in my use with it for the past ~15 years, I first want to set a reasonable, temporal goal to aim for.


    Triggers:

    - Spending time in my basement

    - Spending time alone

    - Stress

    - Boredom

    - Alcohol



    Replacement activities:

    - Mediation

    - Stretching

    - Reading

    - Lifting/cardio (already do this, but can fit in additional time)


    Open Items/Possible Issues:

    - I'll still be able to access porn on my home computer and phone, what can I do to prevent this outside of sheer willpower?

    - Other than deleting my stash, what can I do to keep myself from peeking at home?

    - I’m expecting a big crash in mood from giving up this vice cold-turkey. What will help me from spiraling into even a depression as a result? Anything other than the standard strategies (cold showers/eating well/exercising/etc)?
     
  2. Shaney96

    Shaney96 Active Member

    Rating points:
    94
    Action points:
    634
    Result points:
    709
    Just make sure you're not stretching the pleasure muscle.


    I believe there are things you can download that prevent sites like PornHub etc.. Your next question may then be "what's to stop me from uninstalling said program and watching porn." Well, there's nothing stopping you, apart from the knowing that every time you watch porn, you're pulling yourself away from the vision of a man who doesn't watch porn - your end goal here.

    When I quit porn, I did so by forcing myself to masturbate using only my mind. It's hard to begin with, but when you realize you're stepping closer to that end goal, it feels rewarding to not watch porn.

    Furthermore, when you realize it's external benefits, it makes you appreciate the negative effects watching porn has on your life, and this automatically makes you want to watch it even less.

    Rewarding yourself from x-days of abstinence, for example.
    Also, do some research on the negative effects of porn. I advise reading some stuff from the NoFap subreddit and just anti-porn articles in general (given they have some backing).
     
  3. James

    James Host

    Like all bad habits, view it as a cycle. It doesn't spontaneously happen, things lead up to it, trigger it, etc. Identify them, so you can pre-emptively cut the cycle off.

    Feeling good is not a result of "being sufficiently wanked to porn". It's the default state of a man. Barrel through any withdrawals.
     
  4. zanemwarwick

    zanemwarwick New Member

    Rating points:
    3
    I can relate to the spending time alone, stress, and boredom triggers - they are excellent at triggering escapist tendencies (anything that allows you to run away from reality such as excessive video gaming or internet browsing).

    Can you elaborate more on what kind of thoughts you have when you are in those triggering environments?

    A good list. If possible, you might want to include some social activities; they might help you reduce the frequency of your triggers. Just make sure that you surround yourself with good people.

    Maybe participate in NoFap subreddit or forum for a start.

    The two I've heard:

    http://www1.k9webprotection.com/

    http://www.covenanteyes.com/

    Do stuff.

    If you don't want to do stuff, deliberately don't do stuff. Meditate, relax, listen to something nice...do whatever you want as long as you consciously decide to do those things.

    For now, your default behaviour is to seek porn whenever an urge arises; by being deliberate about your actions, you are overriding that default behaviour.

    Other than the standard strategies, maybe just remind yourself to embrace the depression. Depression that results from doing something good is much better than depression that results from realising that you've wasted substantial amount of time watching porn.
     
  5. HelloFriendo

    HelloFriendo New Member

    Action points:
    83
    Really appreciate the responses, guys. Going to go ahead and get my goal submitted today.
     
    James likes this.

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